So you always wanted to be a private dick huh? Well here is your chance...now NAIL HIS ASS!!
I am looking for someone to come and work at my company for approximately 2 weeks and be my eyes and ears and report your finding directly to me and write a very detailed report upon conclusion of your assignment. The primary focus will be closely watching and monitoring the activities of one individual, your boss, and providing me with unbiased and accurate information regarding this individuals activities in general and particularly watching for signs and methods of theft. I know for a fact, have concrete evidence this person has been stealing/embezzling from me and my company. I want to know exactly how he is doing certain things and who else may be involved as I believe he has an accomplice outside the company, AKA his wife. While your in your deep cover role want you to monitor other aspects of this individuals daily routine and pattern as well as other co-workers and cannot assure (to maintain a convincing appearance) you will work in direct proximity to main subject each day and also to provide me with feedback regarding other employees and to maintain sense of "fair play" with said thief when I fire his ass that he was not singled out solely.... ( like I should have any consideration for a deceitful and sneaky and pathetic petty thief). This is more than typical employee theft as I have treated this person with extreme kindness and generosity helping him numerous times with huge favors like buying him cars, saving his house from foreclosure, paying hospital bills unrelated to work, paying a lawyer to keep him out of jail and on and on and on. I have been tracking his activity for weeks now and he has no idea I am on to him. Sad part is all he had to do was ask me for the money and would have loaned it to him like I have a 100 times in his employment history...Oh, wait...then I would actually expect paid back. Why take a loan out when you can just help yourself to a gift. Most of the theft is happening via credit card transactions in small dollar amounts happening multiple times a day. This is a position where employees report to work and then leave the facility in small teams of 2-4 individuals to perform our services and sell our products. I can't say too much here because can't take any chances someone assuming who I am/company and this getting back to the culprit. There are many other aspects of the day of the typical team I want you to evaluate but especially the main guys team. Are the other team members in on it? Is his wife meeting him and he slips her my credit card and he gets it back somehow later? Are they texting and driving? Any alcohol or drugs? How do the team leaders treat the team members? How is the driving? Are they always professional with the clients and the general public they may interact with? How much time is wasted in gas stations and fast food joints? Where else do they go? Are they following other company policies? Do they act like idiots when they see an attractive woman with large breasts walking down the street and scream inappropriate things to her? Oh the joys of owning a small business. But on the other hand tell me the positives...who is really looking out for me? Who deserves a raise? Who plans to be with my company in 10 years?? Who went out of their way to go above and beyond for a client, etc. So basically you come into my organization as a low level new hire. It's a small company and during your time you will work with each team and each employee but most of your focus will be on one guy. I am looking at this as probably a 2 week assignment. Although we may wrap up sooner or if we are getting a lot of good stuff out there I may keep you on a bit longer. It will to an extent depend how much time I can get you with the main team I am investigating without drawing suspicion.
Another key factor will be the right individual will have to actually work all day with the crew obviously. You can't just hang out all day. Activate the GPS so I know where you guys are all day, try to sneak a few pictures with your phone, maybe record some conversations, and put notes in your phone about the day, you will actually have to work and be convincing about it....well not convincing you will just straight have to work...we perform a variety of labor services and some is skilled and some is unskilled but you don't need to have any experience in our industry just a willingness to work hard and keep your eyes and ears open making and retaining notes. I will obviously clew the selected candidate in on the whole story, what to look for, what info I need, what is happening and how I think it is happening and what I know to be fact and what is a strong theory.
If I already have proof of ongoing and daily larceny why don't I just fire this SOB you ask?? At this point you are the last factor in my investigation. I want to determine how some things are happening to prevent future occurrences and there are several other questions I hope can be answered and to get the run down of who can and can't be trusted.
To win this contract you must be/possess the following traits, skills, attributes, etc.
You must be male, you must be willing and able to perform a full days labor in heat (when not in company vehicle, fast food place, gas station) so really more like a half days work. Which is one of your assignments to track with a stop watch the entire day and the actual time working versus driving versus anything else. You must be serious, honest, detail oriented for both your fake work and your real work, be fairly articulate, be punctual, be fast on your feet, be vigilant, be able to be friendly but remain emotionally detached from these people you are there to give a fair evaluation and report and cannot take any sympathy and or animus against anyone. The sympathy part should be easy cause by and large the main subject is a dickhead and especially to new employees. So be thick skinned. This is another reason he is leaving us and another area you need to evaluate. Which team leaders are fair, which are helpful, which actually take time to train you, which ones take ownership of difficult situations and which ones blame and yells and screams at other employees? Be smart and be cool..this guy is not dumb. He may not be w world beater but he is clever and cunning and devious and insightful. You can't come on too strong and you can't totally not fit in. Somewhere in between but if in doubt just be quiet and listen and watch.
Rate of pay for contract will be based on hours worked per day with a daily stipend for lunch, etc.
You will sign a confidentiality agreement not to reveal anything about true identity to anyone at my company or any one you are investigating.
Agreement will also include you agree to maintain confidentiality of any unflattering information you could learn about my company that I am unaware of presently.
You will be punctual, you will work hard, you will to the best of ability without compromising yourself gather info I will request, you will communicate to me later in the day or evening at a time that works for each of us a recap of the day and we will discuss strategy for following day. You will under no circumstances tell or intentionally expose your true purpose. You will at all times during your contract period represent yourself to be an employee of my company and you will follow all rules and policies as would any employee unless in which case we discuss doing things outside normal policy to further the true reason for your employment or if not to go along and direction of team leader, within reasonable, legal and safe boundaries would lessen your ability to be effective. If at any time you would expose yourself or intentionally compromise the information gathering component of operation you will forfeit and and all remaining compensation as that was the very purpose of your temporary employment contract. Upon completion of field assignment you will publicly ( to the fellow employees) let it be known your reason for departure that we agree or will agree on...new job, etc. or maybe u just don't show back up. You will on a daily basis type up while fresh in your memory a report of that day and get that to me along with any evidence. Upon completion of last team member day you will in short order right a detailed report of your experiences, opinions, observations, etc. Please be reasonably well spoken and have decent writing skills.!
You may make up a fake name and background to use during your time as a team member. Of course I will know your identity. The main guy is not dangerous or threatening so you have no worries, quite the opposite he is a pussy..
We will discuss compensation, etc when we meet for interview.
This operation needs to commence either next week or the following week at the latest. One of those weeks is going to produce an opening which will be ideal to place a new hire on that crew.
We will discuss compensation structure at meeting and upon selection. I will reserve the right to post date a check with final agreed upon percentage of wages and or any bonuses until 7 days after receipt of final written report and exit interview to make last payment. This would only be exercised if I felt candidate might reveal identity or tip anyone in company off. In all likelihood upon completion of the presumed 2 weeks you would meet with me over that weekend to present and discuss report and then would just not return Monday and I would announce you.
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